The girl of my dreams

Sooo… life is fvcked and messed up everyday
here is a rhyme to keep me happy and gay

I met her randomly through a friend of mine
I got to know her and I knew she wanted time
But all the other busses I missed
giving chances and waited just like this

One time we were chatting in happy humor
she wanted more like a growing tumor
but then a time just came at rest
and silence came to our online nest

She got busy it was sad
we drifted apart and am not glad
my heart is aching when she comes online
just to see her with her friend and mine

Now when I chat there is no response
I feel like a sack of potatoes once
but I know life sucks and this is bad
what could be worse? I had also lost my dad

Now days are shitty and time is less
the more time flies the more am not @ rest
if I asked her out I know she’d change
her happy mood to something strange

She had bad experiences at one time
but then that’s the past, now it’s time to shine
I wish I can tell her how I felt
the first time we spoke and how my heart did melt

So I always remember not to regret
for words not spoken and things not said
I look back now and remember happy times
when we spoke and chatting from million miles

I’d never forget her and she’d always be there
Even though I am here in great despair
I just want to see her happy and now she is
so I will leave quietly like the mist

She never saw me as someone special
unless I was a genius or exceptional

A friendly quote

Once on an email I received, I found this quote on it. “Don’t waste time on friends who don’t waste time on you”. If you had followed my blog “How my friendship works” I would always, I mean ALWAYS help a friend. As I wrote in it, it is hard to be an awesome friend and you need to make sacrifices.
I help someone not to gain anything from it, but just pure happiness by the mere idea of helping someone. Most of the times I end up getting really hurt because after all what i did to help a friend they just go their way. After I got that email I just started thinking straight and I finally figured it out.
As in my other post about “Why doesn’t my boyfriend understand me” I mentioned

Like in Buddhism we learn Dukata hethuwa and duka nathikireemae margaya (the reason to be sad and the path we need to take to resolve this sadness).

So I found out why I become sad and I found the answer. Once a friend who is in trouble is helped,  they move along. The place where I made the mistake was to still tag along with them and ask them if they needed more help etc.

How a friend can be a pain in the a**.
Well how does a friend become a pain. Let me tell you with full experience. When you are in trouble and you need a friend, you’d call him/her and tell your problems. So then the friend takes it to the heart and starts helping out. Once the helping starts sometimes it doesn’t stop with just only that issue. She/he would have mentioned other problems and the friend would ask if those were solved as well. Then comes the main part. This is where everything goes wrong. If the friend in need was a girl and the helper was a guy, she’d get the wrong idea that this dude is up to no good and vise versa. Then it comes to a stage where the friend asking to help starts to be nagging. It’s actually not nagging, it’s just that the helped friend takes it for granted and thinks its a pain.

So now my ground policy is I will be there for a friend until she/he needs me and then once it’s resolved I will just move along. I will tell them, “If you need me am always there for you”. it’s up to them to receive the friendship.

hmm this seems small… but I hope I got through to people. ^_^

ttyl all.

Motivation to work – by myself

Work is good, you can do a ton,
If we all had this motive and worked for fun,
it would be nice and easy to say,
that working is not that really very gay.

Some days are bad and other times shyt,
sometimes you just wanna lay a brick.
but if you think you can do this right,
nothing is impossible and can be finished before night.

So when you come to work that day,
Just look at that shyt and just say "Hey,
I love this shyt and do my work,
cos working is my passion, and am not a jerk.

So once you do it and finish this lot,
then you can go home and sleep in a cot.
cos you feel it’s kewl and awesome at time,
to work hard in office and think its no crime,

cos the day was good and it went pretty well,
so the next day your boss would not have to Yell,
"Hey WTF, you didn’t work your stuff,
what do you take me for, a muff?".

So now my story ends here,
and hope this note just gave a cheer.
Have a wonderful and bright day.
shyting and working all the way.

Losing virginity

One fine sunday in the porch was a father reading a newspaper. His daughter came up to him and asked.

Daughter: Dad. @ what age did you lose your virginity?
Shocked and embarrased dad said: errr… 22?
Daughter: Beat ya. I lost it when I was 13

The father fainted.

Vegetarian..

Hmmmmm…. after so long and much fuss I turned into a vegetarian… Yea… I know it looks hard.. but very easy.. If you are a meat lover please don’t read this cos you might change the way you see meat and become a vegetable like myself.

Why the change?
Well the change is because it’s just I wanna change a bit and see. I did a full body checkup recently and everything was border line. I mean cholesterol, blood sugar, etc. So I was thinking how can I change my way of eating? I loved KFC, pizza hut, Bros-ters etc. When i normally get the salary as a treat I go and have something. During weeks I eat bacon and egg pastries, fish and egg pastries etc.

Why did I stop meat completely.
To change myself not to indulge in these fine cuisines I don’t have the will power to stop only eating from these places. So how can I make this happen. I need to change. So therefore i came up with the idea that am going to be a vegetarian.

Motivation to stop meat.
The change came to me slowly. My mom told me stop eating beef. She told never eat it and she stopped buying beef to the house. So when ever I went out. I didn’t touch beef.

Now I needed to stop chicken because that’s the main thing I love eating. So slowly I began to open my eyes and look into things. What do we eat saying it’s chicken? A chicken of course. Have you had a closer look @ a dead chicken? I mean. It was once living, it was breathing and taking dumps. Now it’s dead. Have you seen your mom make chicken? She takes the knife and chop, slice. cleans the gizzard and liver. You know we also have a liver and stuff. We eat this off another animal? It’s grotesque. I feel really sad to think people will actually butcher animals for eating.

You know how they kill cows? they slice the bottom part of the throat of the cow and they drain the blood. Pigs are killed with poles. They hit the pig. dash it on the ground and kill them. Just imagine what would be running through their minds? They feel death. no one wants to die.

So you think by you becoming a vegetarian people will stop the slaughter of animals?
Well, to start something like that we got to start somewhere. I know for a fact I cannot go to the slaughter house and tell them stop killing animals. I cannot go tell other people stop eating meat. It’s stupid. So we have to start small and somewhere. So that small and somewhere person is me.

For more info on this please check my blog on – “How to change myself”.

People are bound to ask me. OMFG you are a vegetarian now? how did you do it? etc. Then those people will learn to start been vegies. Then what happens the need for chicken dies down and slaughter houses will go @ a loss. I know this is a long term thing however I needed to start it now or it will never begin.

I want to thank all my vegie friends for giving me support and courage. So my last line is “Be a man, do the right thing” like what russel peters said.

TTyl ppl

Gamers and girls

So I was casually doing nothing and I thought I should start writing on this cos me buddy asked me. Even if she didn’t i’d have written it.. lol

Anyways so what’s with gamers and girls? What do you mean by that? First let me give you a small definition about a gamer. A gamer can be a female or a male. I bet you thought that I was referring to guys? .

So what’s the difference between a gamer and a girl? well a gamer to another gamer is not different. We are all one, in this virtual world where we all meet and slaughter each other where there are no boundaries. We are all one, we got the same equipment, clothes, we die the same way, we spawn for new rounds the same way. To emphasize this more clearly there is no different when a female plays CS and a guy playing CS.

So what’s the hype about a female gamer? abroad there are many female gamers. They have clans and stuff. It’s a whole new world. So why am I writing this post? well it’s to just say we need to come out of our shells and show what girls are made of in Sri Lanka. Yea baby, that’s right. Sri Lankan female gamers are no where to be seen. I mainly think it’s the culture we have. The way we are brought up.

Remember guys evolve with whatever comes, our resistance to change is far less than a female. Let me get a good example. We all have parents/guardians, yea? So just look at them for a moment. Your mom would be screaming the head off “Why are you playing games?” “it’s a waste of time”, “When we were small your dad didn’t play games”, “Look @ your cousin when they were your age they never played games (this was cos games were rare when they were small)”. Now take your dad for example. You dad will come “Hey what’s this?”, “Some new game?”, “Ok kill that last boss and come for dinner, ok?”. (personal experience)

So how come this happened? well from my PoV i think it’s cos how we are accepted in our society. If there was a female who played games and her friends got to know she’d be the laughing stock in her gang. Women think guys playing games are very childish. I think not.

So this is why we @ Lanka e-Sports (www.esports.lk) are organizing the WCG Colombo event and giving registration fee free to promote female games to get them out and show there friends that they are proud gamers.

To all the female gamers in Sri Lanka “We are but one, there is no shame of losing or any such. We are all equal” so even though you win or lose in the end what matters is if you enjoyed it. So call your gaming friends and set a team and get registered here (http://forum.esports.lk/index.php?topic=24.0).That’s all for now folks will keep you posted on any other event we do.

take care gamers.

Why doesn’t my boy friend understand me?

Hmmmm… well.. I was thinking I should start this but it took some time and since am free now I thought i might as well write it.

The most famous question I have been asked is “Why is my boyfriend not understanding?” she says “I care for him so much and all he does is ignore me”.

Like in Buddhism we learn Dukata hethuwa and duka nathikireemae margaya (the reason to be sad and the path we need to take to resolve this sadness).

What was the misunderstanding they had? well it all starts like this. Normally a guy/girl will have a friend. They maybe best friends or just normal friends. So will take a couple who is just started going out. Now will say the guy gets upset about something. Nothing related to the relationship. The girl gets the whiff of it and starts asking questions.

“Hey, what’s up?”
”Are you ok?”
”Any thing wrong my dear?” etc

The guy replies depending on how much he knows about her. e.g. since they just started going out, his reply would most probably be “Naaa am fine, it will be ok”.

Now how it all started.
girl: “Ane darling, tell me ko?”
boy: “Nothing my dear, just let me be”
girl: “Please tell me, cos i really don’t like to see you upset”.
boy: “I told you nae once, just leave me alone.”
girl: “If there is a problem we need to solve it, please tell me”.

You get my drift right? basically when a guy says “It’s nothing, leave me alone”, they mean it. So please ladies just leave him alone. I know it’s going to bug you for sometime. But in the end he will realize that he ignored you when you were there for him. and he’d come back and tell that he was sorry.

Now again how things can fire off. (ep1)
boy: “Am sorry my dear. I was a bit upset and I needed a moment for myself”.
girl: ”Well, I don’t like you doing that. Am really hurt”.
boy: “I told you nae , it’s all good. Just forget it”.
girl: “What do you mean just forget it?”

You get my drift again? how this could have ended.(ep2)
boy: “Am sorry my dear. I was a bit upset and I needed a moment for myself.”
girl: “Hey baby, it’s ok. i can understand. I just wanted to let you know am always there for you until the end. I love you.”
The guy gets lucky that night.. ..

Now this is where the friend comes in (ep1).
Friend: “What’s the scene man u look pissed.”
boy: “Yea men. I have this problem i told you and my women constantly keeps nagging and asking me what’s wrong. Even if I tell it’s nothing to do with us she keeps telling this shyt man… WTF”.
Friend: “Dude chill, lets go have a beer”.

Now (ep1) if the friend was a girl
Friend “Hey is everything ok?”
boy: “Yea, shape. Just that my girl doesn’t understand my feelings. I don’t know what to do”

As you can see from the example how some other problem becomes their problem.

The best thing to do is talk to your partner. Understand him and his reactions. By no time you guys will be loving each other with less problems.

Me off for now. ttyl

Quote of the day

Whatever you give a women, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a heal. If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.

So if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.

The way my friendship works

Well… hmmm after thinking for sometime i figured out why I should let anyone know how my friendship works.. : )))).. It’s the way I have been for the past few years (7+) helping friends etc..

Well first off I make friends… I am an easy going person and understand people to a certain extent. I put myself in the shoe of my friends and understand what they feel and what they go through. Sometimes I won’t understand cos it get’s complicated. So then i just let it be.

So how does my friendship work? first will check why I want to be your friend?
      well why the hell would i want to be your friend? good question, because you may not have a good friend you can rely on etc. I have come to know that this world is very scary. I have good friends I can relate to so I know the value of a good friendship. But unlike me and my other friends some of the people in this cruel world don’t have good friends to rely on. Some take advantages out of friendships and strands them on a ledge of no return. There are people who will take all the information given by you to blackmail you. So it got me thinking maybe I can help people and help them out. So I started the quest of friendship and love. ^^

      How do you know if a person is worth helping? from my PoV basically I take a big risk. I put myself in front and become friends. Takes me about 15 – 20 mins to get to know a person roughly to see if she/he is worth my friendship. ). Then i will do the occasional “Hii, Good morning, what you up to?”. So from there onwards it’s how you get to know the person.

     Being a true friend requires a lot of hard work. There are loads of sacrifices you might need to make.

The first rule I live by when making friends. Never cross the line between friendship and relationship. Think clear, is she the one you love or does she love you as much as you do? The main point is, it’s useless falling in love with someone who isn’t in love with you. So since you love this person and he/she doesn’t return it back, just be her friend.

Next you should know how much your friend can handle. e.g. Once you start to get to know a person, you should get an understanding of how much friendship they need to survive. Few of my friends needs to be assured that they need to be fine and the day will be good. Asking them if everything is ok? etc. Some friends are very strong @ heart. Relationships that have messed up have made them strong and they can handle almost anything on their own. These friends will only need to be assured that you will be there for them when they need someone to talk. Also these are the most hardest to make friends.

   So I make friends then check if they really need a good friend, if they do am there for them… that’s all.

   Boundaries of my friendship. When you are friends, you have boundaries that will limit your friendship towards a person.

Normal friendship
      This is the normal kind of friendship anyone wants. The person you are friends with has no gf/bf. No complications. So am there for them when ever they need to get on a day to day basis. After they start going out, I leave their side but assure them I am there when they need a friend.

Advisory friendship
      This is the kind of friendship a girl/guy needs when they are going to go out and not sure or they are confused with what’s the right thing to do? I ask them what they want to do, If they give me choices I would ask what do you think and give advice around it. If they say “I don’t know? ” then I tell them to take their time and think it over and come back with some ideas. basically am just a friend to give advice I don’t tell them what to do. It’s the choices they make.

Anyways my policy is if a person already has a friend she/he can rely on I just silence down slowly and disappear because too many cooks may spoil a soup. LOL.

me off…

Funny people

     Well, it’s strange how fellow Sri Lankans joke and pun about others but they get highly offended when you joke about them. They start to retaliate and get angry.

     When i was schooling at college all my friends used to laugh and taunt me about me been a Chinese. I mean I was born in Sri Lanka and I did Sinhala medium @ college. Sometimes I was really hurt cried sometimes too. Yea, very sad situation. Only some friends were really cool. They respect each other. Anyways after sometime I began to think. “People are so funny, they make jokes about me, but when i make a joke about them, they get offended.”. So I finally gave it up and now I just really don’t care.

      You become my friend. If you don’t like me. don’t talk to me. LOL. I cannot simply not joke about people when they joke about me. My jokes are normally lame and not offensive. Most people in Sri Lanka don’t think much. Now after reading this post start scolding me about what i said and tell that Sri Lankas are very understanding and broad minded.

     Well anyways this is my PoV. The way I see things as an alien. he he he. Anyways if you make fun of me be prepared to be the butt of jokes. If you don’t like my style just ignore me. . I have told my friends and all of them know me well. I won’t change because I offended one when all others love me.

    This goes to all the people who talk behind my back saying am joking about them which is not right. LOL.

Take care